"People out there think you're an idiot."

how castles were built

eponymous

 

The Nerve

"90% of success is looking good when you're nervous."
- James Taylor [born 1948]

gammy

"Sports bars are great as they collect all the people I don't want to hang out with and put them in one room."
- Demetri Martin [born 1973]

a joke that is shared exclusively by a small group of people.

"At any given moment, 90% of middle-to-senior management don't know what they're doing."
- John Cleese [born 1939] in reference to his BBC experience

routine

"First thought, best thought."
- Allen Ginsberg [1926-1997]

Andean Alzheimer's

 

 

 For better or worse:

rewind

Q:    What happens when you play country music backwards?

A:    You get your wife back, your truck back, your dog back.

on frenemies

"Comparison defeats joy."
- Joe Rogan [born 1967] in the aftermath of announcing his $200 million Spotify deal and advising the most bitter to simply get better.

"brilliant but cancelled"

 

All three seasons available for puchase on YouTube.

most famous yet unknown writer

 

on philandering

"He's a hard dog to keep on the porch."
- Attributed by Bill Maher [born 1956] to Hillary Clinton [born 1947]

after Rome failed

toyed with vegetarianism

Jesus' wife is the Grail

 

on suffering

“That which hurts, also instructs.”
― Benjamin Franklin [1706-1790]

end-stage syphilis

“You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.” 

― Oscar Wilde [1854-1900],  The Picture of Dorian Grey

recovery mantras

Diego 

I did the things they say I did, but I'm not the thing they say I am.

Fabio

If you want what you’ve never had, you must do what you’ve never done.

once spent then what?

But the half-life of uranium-238 is about 4.5 billion years, uranium-235 about 700 million years, and uranium-234 about 250 thousand years.

Source here.

robot bartender

 

heightened taste, smell

 Hemingway [1899-1961] preferred to be a foreigner in a foreign land.

OCD

"How come when you want things in order, they call that a disorder."
- Brian Regan [born 1958]

a waste of time

"The juice isn't worth the squeeze."

how are you?

 "I'm mentally ill and it keeps me pretty busy."

the future is crème brûlée

"Hold onto your spoons because dessert is coming."

- RuPaul [born 1960]

Americana

 

America's first poet

"Do anything, but let it produce joy."
- Walt Whitman [1819-1892] Leaves of Grass [1855]

Carr's most famous work

 

not in a court of law

"It's your actions that count, not your intention."
- Michael Mann [born 1943] whose credits include Miami Vice